MH ramble
Genuinely disarming conversation with a healthcare person today. "you're absolutely correct, cognitive behavioural therapy is 100% tricking your brain into thinking it's happy" wasn't what I expected to hear, but it was a nice alternative to previous, uh, less affirming experiences.
MH ramble
So of course I've spent the whole rest of the day curled up on my bed feeling fucking miserable because affirming or not I still opened up all the old wounds again and *that shit hurts* especially when you bring up things that can never be fixed and my goodness I have quite the collection of those
MH ramble
Knowing that some damage is permanent does not soften the blow when they say that obviously they can't fix it. It doesn't lessen the anger or regret or grief.
I really would like to hit something with a big stick right now. Possibly a sack stuffed with landlords.
MH ramble
@Sarklor sending solidarity, companionable grief-rage and the certain knowledge even if *stuff* is shit, *you* are not. And that even though it's all brung up and hurting now, it'll settle again.
MH ramble
@froodie We'll see. Nearly 15 years on and I'm no less angry about it, today revealed that much.
MH ramble
@froodie Same. I think I've gotten all the benefit I will from it, back when I was being told "look, we're snowed under and you're not a suicide risk so best we can do is this pamphlet"
MH ramble
@Sarklor I think CBT based techniques can be useful in managing anxiety for example, but in general I don't like it because
a) there's homework involved, fuck homework, homework is a scam
b) reality sometimes really fucking sucks and trying to hack/trick your brain without working on coming to terms with the very real suck-ness seems a bit capitalist
c) my stupid spicy brain is pretty good at detecting tricks/scams and then going back to being fucked up 🤣